Food for Thought

To be Christ-like or even THINK like Christ, you must first LOSE YOUR piece of  MIND to make room

Don’t Worry, Be Happy

Live in the moment, most of the time. Worrying is something we do when we think about bad things that might happen in the future. So the less you think about the future, the less you’ll worry. Still, it’s impractical to not think about the future at all, if you have any sort of responsibilities. The next few steps will address that.

Tackle your worries head-on, and swiftly. You can still anticipate problems and plan for them without necessarily worrying. The key is that when the worry enters your head, you immediately address or resolve it somehow, and then let it go. Be proactive! Let’s say you worry a lot about a house fire. Sit down as soon as you can and make a plan to implement all the steps in how to prevent a house fire, maybe one or two steps a week.

• If a worry enters your head at an inconvenient time, designate another time to address it. If you start thinking about house fires during your child’s school play, for example, you might think to yourself “I’ll go home and make a plan at 10p.m. when the kids are in bed. There’s no use in thinking about it until then.”

• Another approach is to make a list of all the fears that worry you. Go through them, one by one, and make plans. Then…

Move on. Once you develop a reasonable plan, and commit to following it, there’s no need to dwell on the worry anymore. Let it go. The danger in worrying is when a scenario that you dread lingers in your head. Sure, you could always do more, like anticipating every possible outcome and taking every possible step to prevent each unwanted outcome from happening, but you’ll spend your life preventing bad things from happening rather than enjoying the good things that have already happened. And you won’t even be able to stop all bad things from happening, anyway!

• Maybe you need to learn to be comfortable with risk. If you believe you’ve done enough to decrease the chances of something happening by, say, 85%, accept that as good enough. There are simply no guarantees in life.

Don’t recycle the past. Many of the worries we have about the future are fears that the past will repeat itself. Whether it was heartbreak, or an injury, or a natural disaster, it haunts us and we want to do everything in our power from preventing it from happening again. These articles might help:

Stop trying to save the world. If you feel like it’s your job or responsibility to stop bad things from happening (perhaps to your family, your business, or at all) you’re placing too much pressure on yourself. There is such thing as a hero complex, and you might have it. The thing is, you’re only human, and to set yourself to an unattainable standard will only cause pain and disappointment.

Take up activities to keep busy. Anything that preoccupies you and precludes worrying will be good for you, as long as you don’t become addicted to it for that very purpose.

Even if it’s good to keep busy, you shouldn’t fool yourself! Being honest with yourself is the core of living, of knowing what you really want to do and where you really want to be. If you have real issues, deal with them and make that your first priority – as soon as your mental weight is eased from your shoulders, you should start to feel relieved. When this happens, remember that feeling and pursue it!

-WikiHow Definitions-

Will’s Wisdom

Lets Reflect

 

“If you change the way you look at things…..will the things you look at change?”

 

I started writing again…

 

It’s been a long time since I put ink to paper for the formulation of trying to organize my stream of conscience…so I’ll/we’ll see what happens. Last time I seriously and whole heartedly wrote was during my car accident, and the conversations I had with God. I only placed snap shots on my blog…and I may do the same this time, don’t know. But I know I need to write to have my outlet of emotions be expelled…because Im tired of just…being, so I’ll start to write…to write to myself, for clarity, for peace, and to God. I plan on growing just like the last time, so we’ll see what happens, hopefully the formation of a place for more happiness to grow. Don’t know when I will exactly start to write, I assume sooner than later, but I figure I place it in the air that I know change is coming, so I’m getting prepared

 

 

Frame This

1. What you put out comes back all the time, no matter what. (This is my creed.)

2. You define your own life. Don’t let other people write your script.

3. Whatever someone did to you in the past has no power over the present. Only you give it power.

4. When people show you who they are, believe them the first time. (A lesson from Maya Angelou.)

5. Worrying is wasted time. Use the same energy for doing something about whatever worries you.

6. What you believe has more power than what you dream or wish or hope for. You become what you believe.

7. If the only prayer you ever say is thank you, that will be enough. (From the German theologian and humanist Meister Eckhart.)

8. The happiness you feel is in direct proportion to the love you give.

9. Failure is a signpost to turn you in another direction.

10. If you make a choice that goes against what everyone else thinks, the world will not fall apart.

11. Trust your instincts. Intuition doesn’t lie.

12. Love yourself and then learn to extend that love to others in every encounter.

13. Let passion drive your profession. 

14. Find a way to get paid for doing what you love. Then every paycheck will be a bonus.

15. Love doesn’t hurt. It feels really good.

16. Every day brings a chance to start over.

17. Being a mother is the hardest job on earth. Women everywhere must declare it so.

18. Doubt means don’t. Don’t move. Don’t answer. Don’t rush forward.

19. When you don’t know what to do, get still. The answer will come.

20. “Trouble don’t last always.” (A line from a Negro spiritual, which calls to mind another favorite: This, too, shall pass.)

                                                                                                                                                          -By Oprah Winfrey-

A friend told me…

Our first and last love is…Self Love

 

-Priceless

BEAUTIFUL CHRISTIAN SISTER

 

By Maya Angelou

 

 

‘A woman’s heart should be so hidden in Christ
That a man should have to seek Him first to find her.’

When I say…. ‘I am a Christian’ I’m not shouting ‘I’m clean living,’
I’m whispering ‘I was lost, Now I’m found and forgiven.’

When I say… ‘I am a Christian’ I don’t speak of this with pride.
I’m confessing that I stumble and need Christ to be my guide.

When I say… ‘I am a Christian’ I’m not trying to be strong.
I’m professing that I’m weak and need His strength to carry on.

When I say.. ‘I am a Christian’ I’m not bragging of success.
I’m admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess..

When I say… ‘I am a Christian’ I’m not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible, but God believes I am worth it.

When I say…. ‘I am a Christian’ I still feel the sting of pain…
I have my share of heartaches, so I call upon His name.

When I say… ‘I am a Christian’ I’m not holier than thou,
I’m just a simple sinner Who received God’s good grace, somehow!

Pretty is as Pretty does… But beautiful is just plain beautiful!

Thought

The Only people you need in your life are the ones that prove they need and want you in theirs… use discretion

So True….

1. HURT People hurt people  (read again)                - Russel Simmons

 

2. …My life is 10 shades of gray….

     - Left Eye

How Do You Feel?

Music: Amy Winehouse \”Some Unholy War\”

How do you feel on those nights alone?
Cry and moan
For light to guide your way
though…
It feels like no one is home

Hunger for life feels like no food in days…in life

Peace and serenity seem so far away
While in this dark hole I roam and play
With death all alone

How do you feel when your voice is smothered and ignored?
Left at the door
Want to be heard

Yearn for understanding
Can’t fathom the air I inhale
So you chose to siege with your greed
Of what you claim this land, this moment,

And what I may be

But you fail to see
This is more than you
You have screwed you and please don’t consider
That this voice will not be heard
For you have aid a harvest, a path of embracing something

That seems to be expelled from your personal Hell
Thanks for feeding the need to make them hear what you fear
What they need at last
A voice that will feed the masses
And not your backstabbing trifling ass

How do you feel when honesty is optimistic?
So realistic and raw makes a you drop your jaw with “aw”
Thought he may have thought differently
Glad to be what he told me
Thought of me
Nice to be appreciated and know that this is higher than he

Though Thee brought this to both
To feel strokes and what could be heavenly wrote
Never knew
Blushed like the few

thee does the same
Wonder if he knows that also this I proclaim
This is what I meant when I said is there something else to say or name
Saw it hiding, but not denying, just quiet, just had to wait patiently for honesty
To stop lying

How do you feel when you are gutted?

With a man wrench full of blood

Not with love
Or care
Yet he stabs
He dares
Rips your clothes
Thinks you try to moan
When you try to say no, and leave me alone
Eternal scares and tares
That the next will encounter
Unfortunately that’s up for discussion of what is higher than me
Just hope I can deal
Still be gentle and real
Had my virtue taken
By what he thought was good
Went numb to not feel him cum
My tears run
Took a shower
Longer than an hour
Still havoc toiled after it was said and done
Misery called for my life as it seem to spoil

How do you feel when you know your God’s toy?
Something different
Necessarily did not sign up for this
Can’t understand this man, this human, this woman
That I am
But know that I mean well
Like to smell
The goodness of what is possible…
Like early morning rising
First flowers of new abloom
The recognition of being and self and that this is more than you
More than love…if that is possible

Not more than Thee for He made me
Different as the hue that is undiscovered and then said to be new
Something to talk about
To scream and shout
Not conceded just know that I am needed
Just exactly don’t know the reason

So how do you feel when this comes to the light?
At 7am, when morning as began
And the alarm clock won’t end

You write, write, and write

Support System

I was telling one of my great amigos my plans for my future in regards to my careers. To be a wedding planner, a cosmetic chemist, and a make-up artist. I started to feel excited about life again, after I decided to leave GA Tech with my Master’s in Polymer Chemistry rather than my PhD. I felt like my voice was finally going to be heard and what I wanted to do was finally going to happen like a fairytale. I kept talking 100mpm and my amigo said to me “Hold on, let’s do one thing at a time…first and foremost you have bills to pay so you need a job, and it may not be what you want at first.” My air balloon popped and I was mad at one of my biggest supporters. My feelings of my dreams were temporarily crushed and I was pissed of at him. He finally said to me after seeing my face “Always remember I have your being, that’s more than your back.” I cracked a smile…still upset. A week later he hooked me up with a weeding planner in Atlanta who has high clientele and told me to take my time and learn

The Human Back

The Passion of Her…A Night in Adam’s Morgan

 

…I spent most of the night talking to the ex’s friends because they seem more comfortable than the guys, plus I’m tuned into the pussy discovery channel. I’m not gay but I think women are the species that can really understand the beauty of life and its obstacles, especially black women, even compared to twin fish men, gay men, or good guys, and I want to experience that ora of real life rawness and pure passion, that feeling of let’s just be, no ego, all flaws, just vulnerable and honesty…something that seems foreign now

 

Fear

fear not, for I am with you;
be not dismayed, for I am your God;
I will strengthen you, I will help you,
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

—Isaiah 41:10 

I’m not the holly rolly type, but I am a Christian and believe in God…so to have faith means to have no fear, for having fear means you have lost faith. Sometimes saying “I’m scared” of what is too come, making a deadline, or losing your mind while trying to find your purpose in life is not enough and does not gve justice to what you feel. Especially, when you try your damnest to do what is right and sometimes what is excepted for a higher purpose, but God knows I am tired right now. He knows I want to scream and have time to breath; so as I write this at work with hardly no sleep, five 5hr energy shots on my desk, and think of what will happen if I can’t make the deadline, the interview, my dreams come true, and get sleep. Still manage to put on a smiling face that giggles as if to tell everyone I’m not sweating under pressure.  I feel better when I help others, but God knows I scream for help silently…at least God hears my silent cries and for this I can no longer fear the what “ifs” but only keep my faith.

 

Proverbs 14:1
The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.

I guess birds of a feather flock together, but I only act this way with you, so what does that say about……me

My 2 Cents: VOTE!

Ok so here is my 2 cents and 15 seconds of fame as the rest of the world continuos to notifiy you that you can make a difference to “change” America, so go vote today so America can finally continue with chaos in the streets…thanks Phillies fans for the initial declaration (Temple Alumni)

The History Books

Joy comes by the dawn’s early night

http://www.imeem.com/kelou/music/MDhS4ISW/jill_scott_my_petition/

No Limitations: The people’s CHAMP!

The first 2 seconds of hearing Barack Obama becoming the 44th and 1st African American President of the United States of America at 11p the room went silent. Being surrounded by tons of Obama supporters in a local new sports bar in Atlanta, we watched every state that Obama took and then to hear screams, cries, cheers, and seeing jumps of joy, high-fives, and hugs when he took the head seat…the room went silent for me. It felt like the first few seconds after I became baptised , or how you feel when you watch your child being born and you hold him/her for the first time, the first time you got your heartbroken, the first time you caught the spirit in church and “realized” God, the first time your heart jumped out of your chest and your breath was taken away because of the state of ecatasy your were in during that particular phenomenon…that was me…I went numb…it was victory. All these monumental times in life add history to our character and form who we are. This time, I…we became apart of the America’s history and have witnessed no limitations into improving the nation’s character…thus us. I am a black female and know that this has started the bells to ring for true opportunity and breaking of the glass ceiling when looking to the clouds at your dreams. But I think that it is also important to remember that the election of Barack Obama will allow for the others, specifically the younger generations of African Americans and other minorities to realize there are no limitations to their future and capabilities when they are determined and realize that the greater good is for more than them…so what will the next generation do in their life time when there are no limitations

Dream Killers

My Dream Killers

solange_knowles_this_bird

This past weekend I went to TN, to a national science lab to continue my polymer chemistry studies on the interfaces between cyclic and linear combination of polystyrene, polymethylmethylacralate, and polyoxyethylene. Sounds boring and complicated…but my boss and his coworkers did not come with me, so for the majority of the time I did little chemistry and had more me time. In the midst of the project I had great convo with one of my partners in crime that works at the national lab. It was great to have “real conversation” with someone who looks like me, because in this field that’s hardly the case. One topic that was brought up were my future moves and endeavors, since I’ll be done with grad school on Dec. 15 (I hope my boss knows that…oh well). I told her of my love for aesthetics and chemistry in regards to consumer products, cosmetic/fragrance chemistry, wedding planning, and cosmetology. She was really interested and even gave me pointers so that I would not have pitfalls as she did in her previous science careers, and where to find employment dealing with “aesthetics and consumers” rather than chemistry. The conversation gave me a boost of excitement in the anticipation of things to come, even at the 25th hr, when a paycheck will start to look slim very soon. I talked to a few of my friends over the weekend and they also boosted my entrepreneurial and momentum energy levels in regards to careers.

Then I received a call from my mom, just to check on me. My dad picked up the phone and interrupted us to say “so what are you gonna do, go back to school, or move back to MD” I rudely stated “what! ” and “neither one, I’m staying in Atlanta!” As the conversation went on I constantly heard my father say you need to go back to school, only 12% of the population has PhDs, you need to do something, when are you coming back to MD, the work you are doing at the national lab sounds like PhD word, wa wa wa wa wa (Charlie Brown). My parents killed my dreams…instantly…it’s so funny how one comment from someone who has a significant role in your life and does not truly understand your intentions and dreams can turn you red. It’s remarkable to me how they fail to recognize and chose to be ignorant to your needs and wants, and are quick to lay their dreams, wants, and needs on you because of what they think you NEED to do to be happy and survive, or because of what they need…not saying they are, but this reminds me of leeches.At the end of the day, I know my folks have good intenetions, but I am the only one who has to live my life and be buried 6ft under. So rather than criticize, aid in my discovery of me through support, other wise keep your comments to yourself and your damn mouth shut. I have enough daily bullshit, so I don’t need your cow. I went silent on the phone and my mom asked if I was ok and how was the rest of the trip as to change the subject. I was heated, I love my parents, so I didn’t say anything except that I needed to get off of the phone to do some work. That was yesterday…and I have no desire to speak to them still…and right now could careless if I did…it is a shame how cold someone can become to the point that no contact sounds like a sunny day. One of my good friends told me that when someone gets mad and they become silent, that is when you start to worry, because they no longer care enough to work out the problem…hopefully I will speak to my parents soon. I contacted Mr.Big, he always has confidence in me, even when the world doubts me, such a giving and good person. He told me he believed in me, and has told me several times before he has a small job for me after grad school for 2 months to keep me on my feet. I would rather not ask for the help because I believe I do better when I help people. But I would rather do that job than swing around a poll in nada to make ends meat and lose the sight of what is good and righteous…but I have been taking the job into consideration ( I know, bad move, and don’t tell the folks). I have to do what I have to do (with some respect) and to not let my dream killers win. My dreams, goals, and aspirations need to be met because I feel like I have been the martyr for their continuous demise in the grace of my parents.

Postively Divine: Ether

 

Ether: Chakra Points

“ether”

quintessence: the fifth and highest element after air and earth and fire and water; was believed to be the substance composing of all heavenly bodies

Intelligence

 

I knew …

whether or not if I decided to know

what I knew or

           know whatever I know

If I would have knew what I know now

What I know now would have never

… occurred

 

john_mayer_vultures

 

 

I guess not so bad…bad thinking

I was told that the best way to view a person is to never place them too high and to expect disappointment so that you will not be disappointed. However, I am tired of giving people the benefit of this concept and I can’t help but be disappointed in what I thought was true. I am continuously disappointed and sometimes put the ones who don’t disappoint me to the waist side. However, if I view the others at the waist side in a positive light will they do the same…create disappointment? Unfortunately this leads to my buried selfish-thinking and mannerisms of “I am the only one who truly cares whole heartily without a doubt about me” and for that reason I subconsciously (and sometimes hatefully and cruelly) dismiss my disappointments.

What Keeps Me Standing: Letters from Black Grandmothers on Peace, Hope, and Inspiration

author: Dennis Kimbro

 

PostSecret.com…it’s the best!

“I’ve tried to live my life as an example to others…I tried to be loving and thoughtful…I’ve tried to be caring and kind…I’ve tried to be a good person,though many times I’ve stumbled…I’ve tried to be a witness; to play my part;to live humbly and without regret.” “Our lives are our witness, and our witness is our legacy. It is what lives on in the world after we have departed.”

“Surving is easy; living can be difficult. We are so conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments. But great moments often catch us off guard.”

“You never know the power you possess to heal a human heart. Regardless where life may lead, you’ve got a role to play. Sometimes circumstances won’t allow you to reach back, but they should never stop you from reaching over”

Common_Misunderstood

Art Meeting: Vindicating My Art Work

I have an African-American art meeting once a monthin SW Atlanta with other superior artist who have mastered their craft, individuality, and talent. I am the youngest member of the group, the other members are above 40yrs old and have tons of wisdom to share and express. The topic of this meeting was about trying to place our art work on display in creditable high end museums:

Share information with others rather than keep our interpretation, reflection, and knowledge to ourselves

Art is a basic instinct, our reality of beauty which may not be recognized

What is the value? What is the basis of the sum total of what makes me feel good

compensation-favorable objections

We are responsible for what we are worth

We must mesh and fit in, but we must learn how to get in and learn what to do to fit in, push hard for the criteria of admission. Brooklyn museum said “no” because they are an encyclopediamuseum. Are we not worth remembering, not worth recording, not worth history? How can I not fit in a place where personal expression and individuality are proclaimed to be there, a secondary sanctuary of creative gathering and worship, but it’s a matter of who you know and not are.

What type of artist are you.. a painter, a poet, a photographer, why not a master artist- a person with great talent who has arrived? What standards  have we obtained, are we worthy, why not call yourself this, rather  than categorize yourself into a subtitle? Is it symmetry, new, and old, striation, paint strokes, visually acceptable and pleasing?

What does the art collector do? – Buy what they like or prefer, not compelled to buy

What does an art investor do? – Buy what he needs, very selective, will devalue furniture art

Art dealers? – Buy what they can sell

Art is a “bearing” investment, it is negotiable for cash…are you negotiable? Worth cash? Are you to be sold? What if you are different…a man, woman, in or out? Are you worth what they have to sell, to collect, or deal? To survive as artist, do we need to be picked up?

We are important people for whom God has given this talent, so we are just as important as our art work. Is that value, vindication, and worth enough for you to digest?

Never make yourself worthless or doubtful to others who may judge your worth. Show security, stability, and confidence for the beauty is in the eye of the beholder…thus yourself.

This is no right or wrong answer, just be you..that has already been vindicated and validated by the most expensive bidder…you

Impersonal Prosperity

…How can you strive for self-excellence and prosperity when you can’t realize that everyday and all day that this life has nothing to do with what you think or know but with everybody and everything else and how you affect that…I guess with trials and tribulations more light will come to brighten the shades of selfish grey…

 

 

Bring an Apple for the Teacher

 

How do you know when they have put in enough good times, good behavior, learned enough lessons and have enough golden star stickers on their chart, to give them another 30 min of recess?

 

 

Rainbows: Proof that you are never forgotten

Amy Winehouse_Some Unholy War

And God said, This is the token of the covenant which I make between me and you and every living creature that is with you, for perpetual generations

 

I do set my bow in the cloud, and it shall be for a token of a covenant between me and the earth

 

And it shall come to pass, when I bring a cloud over the earth, that the bow shall be seen in the cloud

 

And I will remember my covenant, which is between me and you and every living creature of all flesh; and the waters shall no more become a flood to destroy all flesh

 

And the bow shall be in the cloud; and I will look upon it, that I may remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature of all flesh that is upon the earth

….Just a spiritual mental conscious reminder that ALL should remember, even if everyone else feels pessimistic or other wise about you, never forsake yourself, your integrity, and intentions for the Highest will never forsake you

Hard Work

Alicia Keys_Super Woman

If no one ever notices it, but sees a smile, never recognizes it, but hears me laugh, never ask how I am, but I ask if I can help, I maintain and work hard…till tears fall and sleep is no longer an option let alone breathing I allow room for joy to be stable. I know my dedication and intentions are for the “good”, and if no one sees you working hard, struggling, and fighting for your purpose on cloud 9 remember your efforts are not in vain…even when everyone else sees others wise

My Weekend

Jill Scott_Gotta Get Up

These types of weekends of exceptional recovery and re-cooperation are rare…thank God for my 48hrs of heaven…aka sleep!

Those Times…

N\’Dambi_If we were alone

I love when the event of the aroma of ecstasy is overwhelming, taste of intense sweet sweat, body warmth displays the wisdom of passion, the simplistic act of caressing me here, the rawness of pulling my hair, groping me there, intoxicating high of pleasurable lust and love, kisses on the chakras send signals of patience and urgency, over powers the parameters in which the authentic act occurred

Obama Prayer Secret

from one of my favorite and I believe most powerfully conscious and honest websites: http://postsecret.blogspot.com/

Old lessons reviewed this week: Males

For the past week I have encountered several lessons from my closest amigos. I believe they have came into my life within days apart because I am supposed to be aware or learn something to prep for what is to come or what I must face and make a decision to do.

Scenario 1: From a dear friend who messes with chemicals with me in the lab: told me about how he changed his life to get on the purposeful path of what he must do to be a good man, more importantly a sincere and wise human. I know a little about his life story so far, but I know that he used to have an anger management problem in his teens years and found true comfort in fighting. Things have changed and now he marries couples andgives marrtial counseling. In one of many conversations with him, he talked about how he tries to teach others and his family members to not make the mistakes he has made in his life, because he claims to be one of the lucky ones, and he said to me “if your going to make a mistake in life, don’t keep doing the old ones, if you are going to make a mistake at least make a new one to learn from. If you’re smart and don’t want the same results don’t do what is habitually stupid”

Scenario 2: One of my chicas was packing to go on a trip so I came over to help and catch up on good times. In the midst of the conversation she told me about a young man that wants her to be his mentor from a career panel/discussion that was held between my fellow peers and I at a high school to give kids a glimpse of possible opportunities in careers and more importantly life. She gave the young man her business card and told him to email her to possibly start the formal process of being a mentor to him. Unfortunately, the 17yr old took the relationship out of professional context and my friend had to check the boy of who he was speaking to and the intentions of the professional networking relationship between the two. He finally got the point but failed to communicate professionally with my homegirl and boosted each email with slang, curse words, improper language usage, and bragged about hatters, getting money, and having his 2nd child come along from his 2nd baby mama…the first child is only 3months, the 2nd girl is 2 weeks pregnant. Don’t want to be judgemental but the young man is definitely headed down the wrong path fast as was told to him. Though, it is a shame that the young man fails to recognize his ways. My friend is at lost for guidance and words. She honestly admitted to me that she can not relate to a young black male with no guidance. She asked one of her co-workers who is a male and mentors kids to participate or aid in her mentoring him. Both my friend and her co-worker realized that it’s unfortunately predictable for a young unguided man to look for a female for guidance. With no positive male role model how can a male relate to other males on a productive positive level with the reasoning of their encounters leading to worse things in the future or animosity.There were 2 other men on that discussion panel, however they were dismissed by the young men in the audience to look for guidance in. If a man assumes or knows he has some type or form of control over women and  with women because he is surrounded by women, then this is who he searches for to find change, comfort, hope, and to even deceives because this is what he is used to..used to dealing with and may even control. I support all moms raising kids alone or with their spouse, but there is always an after effect whether if either parent are or are not in the picture of the child’s life. So now this young man searches to become a man through how he deals with women and what he thinks is acceptable, not necessarily right. And then what honest women in the future wants to deal with an man who thinks he is a man, based on the qualities he has adapted through his peers and not being raised with a positive male role model. Hopefully he will see differently and want to change but such beliefs and ill practices have been ingrained. But as expressed by several women, including myself, women do not want to raise a man that was not birthed from her. It’s not our job to teach any man to be a man, for those women who were raised to know what a man is and his role find comfort when a man is fully in his own and shows confidence, pride, and respect. Fortunately, I was raised by my father and know what a man is and what he is supposed to be, though I have seen those who try, who have no father figures, and who do…and I must say they ALL have distinct differences in their personalities, goals, and tribulations in the life,…so I guess you know who I prefer

Scenario 3: Talk with the same homegirl packing for her trip, we started a new conversation on love and when a person recognizes it. I’m not the one for love at first sight, not to say it does not happen, but I do believe in being knocked upside the head by light bulb moments. On the topic, we were discussing how when men know they have something precious and special and thus become careful and cautious towards who they admire or love. Unlike women, who sometimes tend to ponder or keep guard due to many of dates of broken hearts and disappointments, men tend to be very sure about how they feel and will pursue with might to prove he is worthy…and that’s great when a man can be an honest man, not just tough or aggressive, but sure of himself with respectful undying confidence and patients because he knows with modest persistence and maintaining his role victory will be his (if the girl chooses). When these qualities bloom in front of the women he admires she can’t helped but be amazed with the his honesty, because the moment is tough. These types of confrontations allow for “independent” women to remain themselves because the man is not in question of his role (and hers) andthus she can still depend on him to be the leader. Even one of my male friends told me it’s easy to be your friend, but I know that it would take much more to be your boyfriend because you wouldn’t respect anyone who would not stand up to you or for you when they need to and someone you could walk all over you would lose respect for also. Even those men who are not sure of themselves I respect if they can admit that lack something, are not sure of themselves, and need to improve to be a better man…and do. But back to my homegirl and I, we both have strong individual personalities, not aggressive just open minded so we tend to notice when men are sure of themselves, comfortable in their own skin, not cocky, and don’t front to be other wise, because it makes us even take a pause. My homegirl has found an old friend who is proving himself and I must say is confident in what he means and wants to be with her and for her. That feeling feels so good when the ego is used for the betterment of the man…of the human. However, I must say I only have recognized this when a guy is at a time in his life inwhich he knows what he wants and has learned certain lessons in life. NO WOMAN can make this transformation in a man for the sake of her, it is up to him to make that decisions for himself, my father was the same way with my mom…been together 25 yrs and still happily counting. When a man is confident and knows what he wants concerning his future and who he spends it with NOTHING can stop him, I’ve seen it and experienced it.

 For those looking for “other” types of men I must say it may be a waste of time, because it may not be his time, so keep track of your time

It never stops…

For the next 3 weeks I will:

plan and have an Egyptian/Persian wedding for Nov. 28th

Art meeting first of the month 

contact Spelman College for the research technician position

contact International Polymer Co. in Atlanta

contact Disease Control for annual internships

make a dessert for Thanksgiving

decorate my Church’s Christmas Tree

counsel those who have lost loved ones on Tuesdays

Study for 3 finals (polymer engineering, spectroscopy, organic electronics)

payoff parking ticket

keep synthesizing cyclic polyoxyethylene and purify

 

….and breath, sleep, eat, and shower

Minor News: Hilarious Black Friday

 

“If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place
where all things are possible… who still questions the power of our
democracy, tonight is your answer”.
                 President Elect, Barak Obama, 11/4/08

Just a heads up for all fiscal minded folks to think wisely about your
gift cards/certificate purchases this season, and if you still have unused
cards/certificates for stores listed below, you may want to use them
before the store closes. Many of these stores plan to sell gift cards during
the holiday season even though the cards will be worthless come January 1,
2009.

Nationwide STORE CLOSINGS AND LAYOFFS

 Ann Taylor closing 117 stores nationwide.  A company spokeswoman said
the company hasn’t revealed which stores will be shuttered. It will let the
stores that will close this fiscal year know over the next month.

Eddie Bauer to close more stores.  Eddie Bauer has already closed 27
shops in the first quarter and plans to close up to two more outlet stores by
the end of the year.

Cache closing stores.  Women’s retailer Cache announced that it is
closing 20 to 23 stores this year.

Lane Bryant, Fashion Bug, Catherines closing 150 stores nationwide.  The
owner of retailers Lane Bryant , Fashion Bug , Catherine’s Plus Sizes
will close about 150 under performing stores this year. The company hasn’t
provided a list of specific store closures and can’t say when it will
offer that info, spokeswoman Brooke Perry said today.

Talbots, J. Jill closing stores.  About a month ago, Talbot’s announced
that it will be shuttering all 78 of its kids and men’s stores. Now the
company says it will close another 22 under performing stores.. The 22
stores will be a mix of Talbot’s women’s and J. Jill , another chain it
owns. The closures will occur this fiscal year, according to a company
press release.

Gap Inc. closing 85 stores.  In addition to its namesake chain, Gap also
owns Old Navy and Banana Republic The company said the closures – all
planned for fiscal 2008 – will be weighted toward the Gap brand.

Foot Locker to close 140 stores.  In the company press release and
duringits conference call with analysts today, it did not specify where the
future store closures – all planned in fiscal 2008 – will be. The
company could not be immediately reached for comment.

Wickes is going out of business.  Wickes Furniture is going out of
business and closing all of its stores, Wickes, a 37-year-old retailer that
targets middle-income customers, filed for bankruptcy protection last month.

Goodbye Levitz / BOMBAY – closed already.  The furniture retailer, which
is going out of business. Levitz first announced it was going out of
business and closing all 76 of its stores in December. The retailer dates back to
1910 when Richard Levitz opened his first furniture store in Lebanon ,
PA.In the 1960’s, the warehouse/showroom concept brought Levitz to the
forefront of the furniture industry. The local Levitz closures will
follow the shutdown of Bombay.

Zales, Piercing Pagoda closing stores.  The owner of Zales and Piercing
Pagoda previously said it plans to close 82 stores by July 31. Today, it
announced that it is closing another 23 under performing stores. The
company said it’s not providing a list of specific store closures. Of
the 105 locations planned for closure, 50 are kiosks and 55 are stores.

Disney Store owner has the right to close 98 stores.  The Walt Disney
Company announced it acquired about 220 Disney Stores from subsidiaries
of the Children’s Place Retail Stores. The exact number of stores acquired
will depend on negotiations with landlords. Those subsidiaries of
Children’s Place filed for bankruptcy protection in late March. Walt
Disney, in the news release, said it has also obtained the right to
close about 98 Disney Stores in the U.S. The press release didn’t list those
stores.

Home Depot store closings. (E. Brunswick, Rt 18  just put up their
closing sign) ATLANTA – Nearly 7+ months after its chief executive said there
were no plans to cut the number of its core retail stores, The Home Depot
Inc. announced Thursday that it is shuttering 15 of them amid a slumping U.S.
economy and housing market. The move will affect 1,300 employees. It is
the first time the world’s largest home improvement store chain has ever
closed a flagship store for performance reasons. Its shares rose almost 5
percent. The Atlanta-based company said the under performing U.S. stores being
closed represents less than 1 percent of its existing stores. They will
be shuttered within the next two months.

CompUSA (CLOSED) clarifies details on store closings.  Any extended
warranties purchased for products through CompUSA will be honored by a
third-party provider, Assurant Solutions. Gift cards, rain checks, and
rebates purchased prior to December 12 can be redeemed at any time
during the final sale. For those who have a gadget currently in for service
with CompUSA, the repair will be completed and the gadget will be returned to
owners. http://www.news.com/8301-10784_3-9834177-7html <
http://www.news.com/8301-10784_3-9834177-7.html

Macy’s – 9 stores

Movie Gallery – 160 stores as part of reorganization plan to exit
bankruptcy.  The video rental company plans to close 400 of 3,500 Movie
Gallery and Hollywood Video stores in addition to the 520 locations the
video rental chain closed last fall.

Pep Boys – 33 stores

Sprint Nextel – 125 retail locations. New Sprint Nextel CEO Dan Hesse
appears to have inherited a company bleeding subscribers by the
thousands, and will now officially be dropping the ax on 4,000 employees and 125
retail locations. Amid the loss of 639,000 postpaid customers in the
fourth quarter, Sprint will be cutting a total of 6.7% of its work force
(following the 5,000 layoffs last year) and 8% of company-owned
brick-and-mortar stores, while remaining mute on other rumors that it
will consolidate its headquarters in Kansas . Sprint Nextel shares are down
$2.89, or nearly 25%, at the time of this writing.

J. C. Penney, Lowe’s and Office Depot are scaling back.

Ethan Allen Interiors: The company announced plans to close 12 of 300+
stores in an effort to cut costs.

Wilsons the Leather Experts (see comments below) - 158 stores

Pacific Sunwear will close its 154 Demo stores after a review of
strategic alternatives for the urban-apparel brand. Seventy-four under performing
Demo stores closed last May.

Sharper Image: The company recently filed for bankruptcy protection and
announced that 90 of its 184 stores are closing. The retailer will still
operate 94 stores to pay off debts, but 90 of these stores have
performed poorly and also may close.

Bombay Company: (Freehold Mall store closed) The company unveiled plans
to close all 384 U.S.-based Bombay Company stores. The company’s online
storefront has discontinued operations.

KB Toys posted a list of 356 stores that it is closing around the United
States as part of its bankruptcy reorganization. To see the list of
store closings, go to the KB Toys Information web site, and click on Press
Information. ( I was wrong according to one comment, so you may need to research for yourself)

Dillard’s to Close More Stores.  Dillard’s Inc. said it will continue to
focus on closing under performing stores, reducing expenses and
improving its merchandise in 2008. At the company’s annual shareholder meeting,
CEO William Dillard II said the company will close another six under
performing stores this year.

Circuit City will close 155 stores nationwide, including many in the
Indy metro area, Lafayette, and around the State of Indiana.

Outta sight, outta mind…right?

True Life | I’m In A Love Triangle  

 

Unfortunately, I can relate to both perspectives…my conscious/intuition has spoke before…as always

http://www.mtv.com/ontv/dyn/truelife/episode/episode.jhtml?episodeId=147293#bio

…there are other things more important up for discussion, time for something new to blog about

Compromising

Yeah!!! My favorite chica has came back from her voyage and as always we start a great convo. I tell her about my Thanksgiving, my first wedding I helped plan, and my two new career opportunities, while she tells me about turkey on the boat and the relaxing trip. At the end of the convo we hopped on the topic of compromising. As she talked to me like a wise grandmother talking to her granddaughter she spoke of the fact of how we (women) tend to compromise for others needs more specifically the ones who want to be close. How we (women) will do things to be out of our comfort zone to get no affirmation from the other. Sometimes hearing something…at least… “I know how you feel”, “thank you”, or some type of confirmation but rather a continuous “wait patiently in line” is delivered via text. Not in a rush for anything, as they patients is a virtue, just been reminded of the definition of “compromising.” As any human must question in any situation “what are you willing to compromise” and for “what” when it’s all said in done, whatever “it” may be. How much are you will to give up, to feel uncomfortable about, to give, to not feel like you may be taken advantage of, what is your worth, and will it be valued when “it’s” all said and done? Hopefully everything will happen for the best and the best will prevail. This concept has surrounded itself in the thoughts of my career path I chose, my friends, family, and everything else. In this circumstance you must be selfish in some sense because you may lose sight of what is right and good for you…thus don’t compromise yourself for yourself. What if the tables were turned…not to say that they aren’t…just saying “wait patiently in line”

I’m so sorry…

I heard the news through a close friend of yours this morning. I was told not to contact you yet, but know, as always I am praying for you and your family, as you always do for me. I know you are experiencing unbelievable sorrow…please call me if you need me, Love you always!

Times like these put a lot of things into perspective…casual small things and your personal wants and needs become pushed to the waste side because other things are important now, that’s what friends are really for…as always be thankful and appreciate of all things…for things could be a lot different

Alone with Anticipation

When you can’t wait for end, because then it will all be ok “then”…right? The educational rewards and gratification, the great paying career, oh the differences I’ll make….la la la. Until “then”, shakes, panic attacks, no sleep, always napping, need to mentally be away, self indulgence has ran amok to keep sanity…to keep sight of me. At night is the when my thoughts become curious and I try to think back on great times I have shared  with others in my life…but they become bombarded with fear, and thoughts of plan B, C, D, what if it’s not ok, what transition will I have to endure. It would be so nice for someone to hug me, squeeze me tight to not let the bad get in, and let me know that everything will be ok. I know He will not fore sake me, yet my thoughts balance over deep waters of the unknown…the fear of the unknown…and not reaching land…not reaching the state of “ok”. It would be nice to hear another heart beat, as I lay my head next to it, or feel a hand touch filled with concern and patients, to remind me that I am human and that all good things will prevail at the end. I know I need sleep to gain my strength back for the next day to conqueor. But I’m more than a conquer (read 2x). I am more than what I will overcome. I digest what i have been prescribed to keep me calm and sane. All this to get a document on my wall that says “it’s all going to be ok”…may be I’ll feel better after the anticipation has left…this may be when I need the most help

I want you back

The Jackson Fives sing ” I want you back” while I day dream on a park bench smiling at the sun. I think of candylands, waterballon fights, ice cream, and tuck in dreams. I want you back before the meds, before life interrupted you with worries, before you were forsaken. So for the length of the song I decided to come back

Isn’t she lovely

“I think a culture that doesn’t look at the whole range of women’s bodies is very strange…this is all a miracle really”

-Elizabeth Bernstein, mother and entrepreneur

 

“Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.”

-Timothy Leary

My future

I hope I remember when my heart sputtered and skipped a beat because I was overwhelmed with warmth…however, I hope I never forget when the buck stopped there. Just be glad and thankful it happened and hope that it has prepared me for what I see shortly coming over the horizon…rather than be mad it ended

Talking to you

“We are tied together in the single garment of destiny, caught in an
inescapable network of mutuality. And whatever affects one directly affects
all indirectly…I can never be what I ought to be unless you are what you
ought to be.” 

- Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

To God be the Glory

I’m finally done grad school….

 If I could find the words or the energy to express all that I have been through in the past three years, I don’tthink I could handle it myself in one sitting. Maybe I’ll blog about at a future date, but for now…and always…to God be the Glory that I have survived and live to tell my testimony to others. At the end of the day God knows the full story and know ALL of the things I have seen and endured. I thank God every time I think about it, every moment I can, that’s the biggest lesson I have learned

as a side bonus, I got my Master’s Degree in Polymer Chemistry from GA Tech

Food for Thought

 

As the new year approaches and the end of the current one is near, I have started to reflect on what I want to come. Of course we all want to be wealthy not not rich, to maybe one day find love and not lust, and to wish for our circumstances to change and for change to come. However, in a previous post I wrote about the number “9″ and its meaning of final judgement or the ending of a current era, circumstance, or situation. I wish all people great outcomings in the new year, but let this year be the year of what needs to end in your life to end. How can you expect such great things of yourself when you maintain a habitual rock and hard place, for there is literally no room to prosper or for any type of blessings to overflow. So please notify any person, situation, or circumstance that the new era does not need them/it. As any person should know that the circumstances that you are in or were in, were allowed by you, and only you can prohibit such acts from occurring against you. I will also be practicing this philosophy…it actually already started…

“How long do you really think I will let you keep me here for”

                                                                   – from the movie Powder-

More Food for Thought

Sin – to miss the point of human existence; to live unskillfully, blindly and thus to suffer and cause suffering

“The term, stripped of its cultural baggage  and misintrepreatiojns, points to the dysfunction inherent in the human condition”

“You do not become good by trying to be good, but by finding the goodness that is already within you, and allowing that goodness to emerge. But it cam only emerge if something fundamental changes in your state of consciousness”

…hope you are genuinely good and mean well for more than the sake of yourself

hate that bitch called “Karma”

I saw a blessing…

Common ft. Cee-lo_ Make My Day

just for me…

 

“went to the sand and got more than a tan…” -Common-

   

Some Sexy Advice

 

“The most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone to love the you -you- love, well that’s just fabulous.”

 - Carrie Bradshaw

Parades and Education

Education, understanding life, and each other is like hearing something and choosing to listen, however there are those who hear…hear symphonies, parades, and sirens continuously but chose to never listen and ignorantly display their hearing aids

Oh how the seasons change

 

katy_perry_i_think_im_ready

Feeling like this for quite sometime, gotta start the New Year right…

 

 

1 John 2:19 (paraphrasing):

You  (friend) are not just with me but you are for me, you give me what you would want with no hesitation…thus you are my divine connection… my friend.

 

However, there are some people that are only meant to be in your life for a season and not forever. Do not allow this to make you upset or sad, don’t try to prolong the inevitable…which is the act of them leaving…for if they are meant to stay in your life they will be there without you hoping, begging, pleading, wishing because it is a divine connection. People come in your life to fulfill a purpose, to make you aware of something that you were not before, or to teach you a lesson…but once their purpose is fulfilled you need to let them go to grow as a person because you are now capable of what you were not and so are they. Thank them for this, but do not let them hinder you, for God makes you able. If this lesson is understood between seasonal friends the path they may cross in the future is more likely to be a more pleasant one.

 

1st Corinthians 13:11:

When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things

 

I guess the New Year means no more immature ways, or at least a change for the better, to become a better person, not just a woman, thus some old habits must end, and some divine ones must be recognized and apperciate, as they were not before.

 

It’s amazing how God removes people in your life through his will and the next person who comes along…sent by God…has great timing and is a giving humble person to start the next great thing in your life. God will never give you the desire, without the ability, the spirit of fear will allow limitation and crutches to form, thus the blessing and destiny of God will not come.

 

 

 

…until next season…maybe

wonder who will notice

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CNN.com/living: Things that it’s OK to lie about

1. The number of sexual partners you’ve had plus or minus five

2. That you totally just washed your hands

3. That the reason for your bags is not, in fact, that you were out late partying but that you were up late reading “Twilight”

4. That you’re naturally toned

5. How much you paid for that (ridiculously cheap) pair of shoes

6. How much you paid for that (ridiculously expensive) bag

7. That you’re not planning on seeing “Marley & Me”

8. That your favorite magazine is, duh, The New Yorker

9. That you can not do a headstand in yoga class

10. That you made that lasagna yourself

11. Your height and weight on your driver’s license

12. That this is your natural hair color

13. That you totally read “The Feminine Mystique” and it changed your life

14. That you stayed at work a full hour after your boss left

15. That you didn’t just fart right now

16. That you don’t know all the lyrics to “I’ll Make Love To You” by Boyz II Men

17. That of course you floss every day, Dr. Smith!

18. That you never ever, ever look at so-and-so’s Facebook page!

19. That you just love your friend’s boyfriend/husband

20. That you really adore that pink sweater and thanks so much Grandma!

21. That you always recycle

22. That you had only one glass of wine last night not five because that would be excessive

23. That your current boyfriend is totally the best sex of your life

24. That you’re not the jealous type

25. That you read all sections of the paper, not just the Style and Entertainment sections

“http://www.cnn.com/2009/LIVING/personal/01/06/tf.okay.lies/index.html”

I heard some good Son-to-Father Advice

These rules and lesson to live by as a man in regards to a women were taught to one of my great friends, and was told to me last night:

1. A man needs to be the source of security for his wife and family; that if any event should happen where his wife and kids are justifiably unhappy then he will not allow them to suffer for the sake of their economic stability or allow harm to their mental, physical, emotional being.

i.e. The example he gave me was from his father, his minister, his uncles, and God father- If your wife decided to leave her job without notifying you (the husband) you must accept her and her decision because you are the provider. Still let her and your children be independent, but they should never question that dad/husband will not let us suffer to pay the mortgage, bills, etc.

2. Never forget that a woman is more than capable of being on her own and succeeding in her goals, but she should have the pleasurable option, not need, of celebrating that joy with someone else

3. A woman needs to feel and be appreciated as a woman, as much as a man needs to feel and  to be appreciate as a man, so remember that a man can be a man, but do not forget about your wife, for you can be a man that is a lonely man

Body Language

Attraction

If men are attracted to someone, they occasionally play with one of their ear lobes, whereas women will play with a lock of hair or continually tuck their hair behind their ears. Ear lobes also means that the person is anxious

I Love You

People that fancy other people often touch themselves where they would like to touch the other person (for example, stroking legs), keeping their bodies pointing towards the object of desire. Eye contact is held slightly longer than usual, sideways glances and smiling are all common. Women playing with their hair, wiping imaginary dust off the other person’s clothes, leaning forwards towards the other and standing or sitting closer together than normal are all signs of attraction.

Mirror, Mirror

Here’s another way to test how well you’re getting along with someone. If you’re in tune with the person you’re speaking to you’ll often find you unconsciously mirror each other’s body postures. So, if you rest your hand on your chin, the other person will follow you. If he or she leans forwards you’ll find yourself making the same move and so on. This is a technique for making interview candidates feel at ease. Amazingly, it actually works, although if you’re too obvious about it, it’s going to look bit spooky and will have the opposite effect.

I Hate You

If you want to tell someone you really don’t like them, narrow your eyes, tilt your head back and to the side and keep your lips together. Folding your arms always helps. The narrowing of the eyes is an animal instinct thing (as seen in the behaviour of dogs and certain apes), tilting the head back and to the side force you to look down on the person and shows a distinct lack of interest. Crossing your arms is pure defence – leave me alone!

Freaking people out by looking two feet to the right/left of them is something the eternally inquisitive are always doing. Frightened of missing out, they tune one sense to one person and another to a distant spot.

The main difference between sitting and standing is that sitting is a relatively defenceless position, therefore almost forcing trust and empathy. When arguing, it is easier to walk away while standing than getting out of your chair and stomping off.

 

can you read me…

Pot Calling the Kettle Black

“Do not judge lest you be judged. “For in the way that you judge you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you. “And why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? “Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and behold, the log is in your own eye? “You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.” (Matthew 7:1-5)

…what you see is what you get

Priceless, Couldn’t have said it any better…

“I know my actions speak louder than her words. Either way, you weren’t listening.”

-Ms. K. Irby

Food for thought Pt. 2

 

“The ego always wants something from other people or situations. There is always a hidden agenda, always a sense of ‘not enough yet,’ of insufficiency and lack that needs to be filled. It uses people and to get what it wants, and even when it succeeds, it is never satisfied for long. Often it is thwarted in its aims, and for the most part the gap between ‘I want’ and ‘what is’ becomes a constant source of upset and anguish. The famous and now classic pop song ‘(I can’t get know) Satisfaction,’ is the song of the ego. The underlying emotion that governs all activity of the ego is fear. The fear of being nobody, the fear on nonexistence, the fear of death. All its activities are ultimately designed to eliminate this fear, but the most the ego can ever do is to cover up temporarily with and intimate relationship, a new possession, or wining at this or that. Illusion will never satisfy you. Only the truth of who you are, if realized, will set you free.”

 

A honest MUST read for every human being who wants to get to know themselves…

Air Time with Mi Amigo

ELITE DC Radio :: DC MD VA Lifestyle Specialist

http://www.elitedcmag.com/radio.shtml

every Wednesday night from 9:30 – 11 pm

Check out my courageous homeskillet and his advice on sex, love, and relationships. The show has been on for some time, but unfortunately, I have not heard the show myself until my childhood friend, the host Mr.Pierre, reminded me. Make sure to listen tonight!

May have one of my blog postings in the magazine version of the radio talk show, this should be good….

25 Random Things About Me

I figured I’m bored at work so let’s pass some time

1. I hate raw veggies with a passion. In my eyes you have to be a special person to know how to make a salad taste great. However, I love cooked veggies international style or in any international cuisine. My favorite veggies are sun dried tomatoes (fruit?) and spinach, I always try to make meals in which I have both in some manner…ok enough about veggies

2. I may no longer do art anymore, but love to cook and cook for others. I would love to teach others to cook…or volunteer in art therapy for kids

3. The majority of my male friends have had feelings for me of more than a friend in some manner, I however don’t feel the same way the majority of the time, and even those who thought I may, may get a unexpected answer if they asked

4. I’m a naturally dreamy girl, I love to daydream all the time, think of ways to be a better person, become enlightened, read philosophy and mentally changeling book, read about cultural identities and civil liberties. I like to enjoy life my way and sometimes create and like to believe my own world…and not the stuff I see everyday on the streets. I actually become really excited when I daydream, and prepare for it like its Christmas.

5. I believe I have heightened senses to the nth degree, so I tend to scare myself by sensing what is not there (you can imagine the rest), and my woman’s intuition is 95% correct

6. I tend to draw all types of people to me, but those who doubt themselves, have low confidence, are not sure of themselves, or compare themselves to others tend to not last long in my life, and by divine nature they become dismissed.

7. I have a huge heart for kids, animals, and those who have become the effects of other people’s reckless causes

8. At my church I aid in counseling people who have lost loved ones twice a month and send out sympathy cards

9. I was baptized in April 2007 in Atlanta, GA. However, I believe I was saved in my college dorm room at Temple University in the summer of 2005 while doing my homework in the afternoon…no joke!

10. I’m a Pisces, artistic, black feminist, who is also a chemist, passionate provider of love, napoleon complexed individual

11. I love anything with CHEESE, especially pepper jack cheese

12. I stutter when I am anxious, nervous, excited, and have had to take speech therapy to overcome this challenge several times through out my childhood

13. I used to cry as a child whenever I thought of my parents dying

14. I have 17 screws and 2 metal plates in my right ankle from a car accident I was in, in May 2007

15. I love my brother to DEATH, even though we fight sometimes like cats and dogs, he always gives my great advice and he always supports me as I do him. I wish him the best in all he ever does!!

16. My middle name is Nicolé not Nicole

17. For some odd reason I always attract Pisces people into my life

18. As you can probably tell I love learning about Zodiac signs. When I first meet a person I usually ask what is there birthday

19. I love dark chocolate, and I hate milk chocolate and white chocolate

20. I am a chemist but would love to be a cosmetic chemist and cosmetologist that travels around the world and lived temporarily along the Mediterranean promoting my cosmetics and exposing my children to other “arts of living”

21. I have a blog that a few people know about because I am brutally honest on it and I don’t want to be judged…I actually wish no one knew about it so I could be more honest and direct

22. I have a Master’s in Polymer Chemistry and a minor in Analytical Chemistry…but I was supposed to get my PhD in them…I just hated GA Tech (grad school) too much…it started to mess with my health and well being…however I wouldn’t change a thing because it prepared me for the worst

23. My mom and grandma have lupus…and I wonder if it will affect my health one day

24. I would love to go back to school to become a sex therapist and woman activist, promoting safe sex awareness, self-esteem, and sexual confidence and positive and constructive inquisitiveness

25. I’m a daddy’s girl, and judge all men by the standard of my father. I love how I see him love my mom and how they both need each other and can’t live without one another. They have been married for 25 years and hopefully I will have the same

I must admit I want a Snuggie

 

The Marshmallow Test

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly of Valentine’s Day (Postsecret Pics)

…I must admit, mine’s was quite lovely this year

 

to see more pics from postsecret go to http://postsecret.blogspot.com/2009/02/valentines-secrets.html

WebMD, HIV & AIDS Health Center: New Vaginal Gel Stops AIDS Virus

New Vaginal Gel Stops AIDS Virus Cosmetic Ingredient GML Protects Monkeys From AIDS Virus

By Daniel J. DeNoon WebMD Health News

Reviewed by Louise Chang, MD

March 4, 2009 — A new kind of vaginal gel prevents sexual transmission of the AIDS virus in monkey studies. The anti-HIV ingredient in the gel is glycerol monolaurate or GML. It’s already FDA approved as an ingredient in cosmetics and medicines. “The results are very encouraging. They point to a novel avenue to prevent sexual transmission of HIV,” study researcher Ashley T. Haase, MD, head of the microbiology department at the University of Minnesota, Minneapolis, said at a telephone news conference. The surprise finding that GML can block HIV comes from basic research showing that the AIDS virus gains a foothold in the vagina by taking advantage of the body’s immune system. Immune responses to the virus draw T cells — the white blood cells HIV loves to infect — to the site of infection. Without T-cell recruitment, HIV loses its grip. That’s where GML comes in. The antimicrobial agent affects immune responses and breaks the chain of events that let HIV spread through the body. “We thought if we could modulate the immune response at the portal of HIV entry, we could block sexual transmission,” Haase said. “[Colleague] Patrick Schlievert’s work with GML showed that it had many properties that might block HIV expansion and systematic spread.” Haase, Schlievert, and colleagues gave five rhesus macaque monkeys daily GML treatments before putting 200 infectious doses of deadly SIV — the monkey version of HIV — into their vaginas. Another four animals got a gel without GML. The four animals not given GML got AIDS. Those treated with GML showed no sign of infection during the short-term study, although one of the five animals showed signs of infection several months later. But just as HIV drugs with different modes of action are more effective when mixed into a drug “cocktail,” Haase says GML could be mixed with different kinds of anti-HIV agents. “GML could be part of a combined strategy with another vaginal microbicide, such as PRO 2000, with a different mechanism of action,” he suggests. Ingredients of GML Anti-HIV Gel in Common Use GML is found in breast milk, Schlievert says, and it is used in many cosmetics and in medicines taken orally or used on the skin. And recent studies show that GML kills many different kinds of germs — including vaginal yeast infections and several different sexually transmitted diseases, said Schlievert, professor of microbiology at the University of Minnesota. “GML is presently being considered as an additive to tampons because of its ability to interfere with bacterial growth, including the bacteria that cause toxic shock syndrome,” Schlievert said at the news conference. For vaginal use in the monkey studies — and with an eye toward future human use — GML was mixed with KY Warming Liquid, an over-the-counter product widely used as a personal lubricant. “What was done was to combine two FDA-approved medical devices to create another approved device,” Schlievert said. However, Schlievert said GML has not yet been tested for long-term human use. And there’s a lot more work to do with monkeys before GML gel is ready for human tests. That will have to be done before human studies of GML gel for HIV prevention. Haase, Schlievert, and colleagues report their findings in the March 4 online edition of the journal Nature. View Article Sources SOURCES: Li, Q. Nature, published online ahead of print March 4, 2009. News teleconference with Ashley T. Haase, MD, head of microbiology department; and Patrick M. Schlievert, PhD, professor of microbiology, University of Minnesota, Minneapolis.

© 2009 WebMD, LLC. All rights reserved.

http://www.webmd.com/hiv-aids/news/20090304/new-vaginal-gel-stops-aids-virus

No Good!! Georgia Senate Approves Bill to Prohibit Stem Cell Research

Georgia Senate Approves Bill to Prohibit Stem Cell Research Georgia’s Senate Republicans Thursday approved an amended SB 169 that prohibits embryonic stem cell research and therapeutic cloning. Approval followed party lines with all 34 Republican Senators voting in favor of the bill, and all 22 Democrats voting against it. SB 169 now goes to the House for consideration.

 

Georgia Bio will continue opposing the bill and we will need your help. The final vote in the Senate concluded several hours of heated debate. In the initial vote, eight Republicans joined the Democrats in tabling the bill. That would have ended SB 169 for the year. But the Senate Republican leadership adjourned the session to meet privately with the eight.

 

Over the next hour the bill was rewritten to focus specifically on prohibiting embryonic stem cell research and therapeutic cloning. The new version eliminated defining an in vitro fertilized egg as a person, and there are no criminal penalties. But the bill states embryos cannot be created in vitro for generating new stem cell lines and the language is confusing with respect to donating existing unused embryos from IVF clinics to generate new stem cell lines. The intent of the bill is clear: prohibit embryonic stem cell research and therapeutic cloning, branding Georgia an anti-technology and anti-science state, and telling patients and their families Georgia does not care about their suffering and will not support life-saving research.

 

We will update everyone as soon as SB 169 is assigned to a House committee.

Charles Craig, President Georgia Bio

 www.gabio.org Register for the 2009 BIO International Convention The Global Event for Biotechnology May 18-21, 2009 – Atlanta, GA

I love postsecret.com: food for thought

 

“I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.” – Romans 7:15

Recognizing the Happy Place

 

Never stay in bondage for too long, stay to gain whatever is needed, maybe wisdom and insight, then say bye…

staying for too long forces you to not recognize, touch, and sense goodness again

Top of the Mountain

 

Seasons are changing and new things are being divinely answered in the quest of great and thankful living. I am so fortunate and thankful that when I ask for favors or order in my life, He comes right on time, right when I need it. Sometimes I’m scared or nervous to ask because He makes miracles appear in my life ASAP, and I gotta make sure I’m ready. If I ever forget or become shaky in my decisions, God forces an overflowing movement through random phone calls, friends, family, or proof through life’s evidence and human actions that I sit back and watch, to know that I have good. One of my friends reminded me of how I wanted things in my life to change and how I asked God for this in a prayer. I didn’t know what to say or do to allow room for what I divinely deserve, for someone who “gives” has been “taken” bone dry. Now the seasons have changed and the unnecessaries are gone, and my friends say “wow, it all happens for a reason and purpose, and it did.” Now I am getting an abundance of replenishment, something I have never experienced until now. Most of all I am thankful for everything I had to endure to get here. The ride keeps getting better

 

 Over That Hump – Erykah Badu

I Wanna Give A Shot Out To…

This post is based on one of my favorite Amy Winehouse melodies, so I thought how could apply the song to me…got it:

This goes out to all the ex-amores…don’t forget you’re an “ex” for a reason…it”s so funny how calls come rolling in after you are off the market

 

Amy Winehouse – In My Bed

…the song is just priceless

Birds of a feather flock together…or is that fish?

You always listen, love, hear, understand, laugh, and pass the wisdom onto me

All this for me …from you

Thankful

Blessing

Took me forever…sorry

You were always patient

My smartass

Didn’t know this existed

Speechless

Musiq – So Beautiful

 

sorry guys, that’s not really him

Thought You might like….

…since you told me you read my spot everyday

To: Babes

From: Babygirl

Words usually not Heard when “Walking in Love”

Because you have shown me that you are love (3),  and that love is the most excellent way (4), I choose to obey you by walking in love as Christ has loved me (5). Grant me the grace to be patient and kind, to love others without envy or jealousy, to not be puffed up and haughty, to not behave rudely, and to not ever be self-seeking (8).

(3) 1 john 4:8, (4) 1 Corinthians 12:31, (5) Ephesians 5:2, (8) 1 Corinthians 13:8

 

 

 

No wonder you feel sick?!

affluenza, n. a painful, contagious, socially transmitted condition of overload, debt, anxiety and waste resulting from the dogged pursuit of more.

affluenza, n. 1. The bloated, sluggish and unfulfilled feeling that results from efforts to keep up with the Joneses. 2. An epidemic of stress, overwork, waste and indebtedness caused by the pursuit of the American Dream. 3. An unsustainable addiction to economic growth.

For all of those who just can’t get better and live in the cycle of the highs and lows of being sick

The Mayonnaise Jar

 

When things in your life seem, Almost too much to handle,
When 24 Hours in a day is not enough,
Remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class
And had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly,
He picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar
And proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students, If the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured
them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open Areas between the golf balls.

He then asked The students again
If the jar was full.. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand
And poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded
With an unanimous ‘yes.’

The professor then produced Two cups of coffee from under the table
And poured the entire contents Into the jar, effectively
Filling the Empty space between the sand.
The students laughed.

‘Now,’ said the professor, As the laughter subsided,
‘I want you to recognize that This jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things – your partner, family,
children, health, friends, favorite passions and your Maker.
Things that if everything else was lost
And only they remained, Your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter Like your job, house, and car.

The sand is everything else –
The small stuff.

‘If you put the sand into the jar first,’ He continued,
‘there is no room for The pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time And energy on the small stuff,
You will never have room for The things that are
Important to you.

So…

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Play with your children.
Take time to get medical checkups.
Take your partner out to dinner.
In fact regularly keep shining up those golf balls as we too often neglect those that are most important to our continued and long term happiness!

There will always be time
To clean the house and fix the disposal.

‘Take care of the golf balls first –
The things that really matter.
Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.’

One of the students raised her hand
And inquired what the coffee represented.

The professor smiled.
‘I’m glad you asked’.

It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,
there’s always room for a cup of coffee or two with one of your friends.’

Please share this with other “Golf Balls”

Purposeful QT Time

While my Babes and I don’t have kids, I aways believe it is necessary to designate QT (Quality Time) time together to make sure we address each other on intimate levels. As with any healthy relationship we know that our significant other loves us, adores us, and has the best intentions, however purposeful dates, romantic getaways, and walks in the park never hurt, but add icing on the cake. I must admit, with work, participating in church ministries, hanging with my chicas, and soon to be cosmetology student my babes and I spend less on purpose QT time. My babes is working on his PhD in organic chemistry, organizes minority youth to field trips for science exposure at GA universities, flips condos on the side, while preaching the gospel. In our busy schedules we have decided to start maintaining date nights, so the first scheduled one is this Saturday. I got a new dress and I’m going to fix my hair the way he likes it.  I’m no love expert, but I recommend all couples do the same in remembrance of each other…kids or not

/living

Novelist and screenwriter Nora Ephron once wrote, “When you have a baby, you set off an explosion in your marriage, and when the dust settles, your marriage is different from what it was.”

My husband, Greg, and I sure felt a big shift. After our two girls were born, our otherwise strong marriage faced more than a few battles — and a lot of just plain neglect. Like most new parents, we were engrossed in taking care of our daughters’ everyday needs.

Finding time to feed, bathe, and play with them between our work schedules was challenging enough. Hanging out as a couple wasn’t even on the to-do list.

But there was more to it than time management. There were the routine squabbles about everything from how to discipline the girls to our own expectations — and disappointments — about our postbaby selves. I wasn’t fun-loving enough anymore; he was watching too much TV and talking to me too little.

Through it all, the nagging question remained: How could we nurture our marriage — the relationship that created these beautiful children to begin with — and still manage to be good parents? It often felt like an impossible balancing act.

It happens to the best of us

Many couples do exactly what Greg and I did, says Carol Ummel Lindquist, Ph.D., author of “Happily Married with Kids: It’s Not Just a Fairy Tale” and a mom of two. We give plenty of attention to our children and not nearly enough to each other. And over time, that shift in focus can start to hurt even the most solid relationships.

“The irony is that a strong relationship with your partner is one of the best things you can do for your kids,” Lindquist says. “You and your husband are modeling a good relationship, which sets your children up for better marriages themselves when they grow up.”

Sounds ideal — but tough. First of all, we’re just more tired. Who’s got the energy to be romantic — heck, to even hold a conversation for more than five minutes — after spending a day at the beck and call of a baby?

And then there’s all that unabashed baby love. More than one doe-eyed mom I know has sheepishly admitted that, for a while, she loved her new baby more than her husband.

“After Nicholas was born, I suddenly had two important men in my life — my husband and my son,” says Jennifer Maldonado of Tualatin, Oregon. “I was focusing all of my energy on being a mom. And for a while, my husband and I were just acting like roommates who happened to share responsibility for this new little person.”

Pointers for a strong partnership

How can you keep a focus on your marriage when most of your time and energy is devoted to your kids? “Try to treat your relationship with your partner as the one that’s most important in your life — even more than the one with your children — and the whole family will benefit from it,” says John Rosemond, a family psychologist and author of “John Rosemond’s New Parent Power.”

Sounds harsh to put your baby second? Rosemond says he isn’t suggesting that parents forget about their kids’ needs, and he admits that there will be some natural relationship neglect during the first years of your child’s life. But, he says, it’s actually pretty easy for you to do small things that will convey to each other — and to the kids — how much you value your relationship

Grtchen Roberts and her husband, Derek, of Fort Wayne, Indiana, want their 2-year-old daughter to know that they’re not always going to drop everything when she wants their attention.

“We don’t let her demands interrupt our conversations if they’re not pressing,” says Gretchen. “As she gets older, she’ll be able to participate more. But in the meantime she’s learning that, with a few exceptions, she has to listen and wait her turn to talk.”

Create warm welcomes

Sure, you hug your kids and pet your dog every day. But do you greet your husband with the same enthusiasm? Once in a while, kiss and hug as if one of you is going away and you aren’t going to see each other for a week. Let the kids giggle: This kind of affection reassures them that you’re close to each other, as well as to them.

Try 20-minute reconnects

You don’t need a whole weekend away or even a regular “date night” to keep the spark alive. Dov and Chana Heller, both Beverly Hills-based marriage therapists and the parents of five, take short walks alone to catch up when they can.

Another option: Pair up to chauffeur the kids to daycare or pick them up from an activity, and use the kid-free portion of the commute or waiting time to chat.

Set early bedtimes

“When my kids were young, everyone went to bed by eight-thirty every night, no exceptions,” says Mary Anne Koski of Lake Oswego, Oregon. She and her husband, Kent, raised nine kids, and the only time they got to spend alone was at the end of the day.

“The kids didn’t have to be asleep, but they had to be in their rooms and out of our hair. That way, we made sure we got a chance to talk.”

Share the load

Chore time can also be prime couple time. After putting their daughter to bed each night at 7:30, Jessica Boulris and her husband, Brad, of Pawtucket, Rhode Island, turn off the TV and listen to music while they make lunches for the following day, iron clothes, or fold laundry.

There’s an added benefit to this kind of couple time: “Because we’re helping each other get stuff done, there’s no resentment about who does more,” says Jessica.

Encourage your kids’ independence

When children learn to entertain themselves (quietly, we hope) for short periods of time, it means less time you have to spend as your tot’s activity director and more time for yourself and your husband. Now that our oldest daughter, Sophie, can pour bowls of cereal and milk for herself and her sister, Flora, Greg and I are able to get an extra ten minutes in bed on weekend mornings.

Revive your past

Has your couple-time routine become, well, routine? Ask yourself, “What did we used to have fun doing together?” Whether it’s listening to live jazz or playing miniature golf, try it again.

“A lot of times those activities have leftover magic in them,” says Lindquist. “They can help you remember who you were as a couple before you became parents.”

Put sex on your schedules

Sounds a bit unspontaneous –and it is. But it’s often the only practical way to make sure you keep your intimate relationship on your to-do list. “It’s perfectly okay to agree, ‘Tuesday night is gonna be our night,’” says Chana Heller. “We all like to look forward to good things.”

Fight as if the neighbors can hear you

Loud bickering is insulting, says Lindquist, and can zap the intimacy out of any marriage quickly. Throwing verbal low-blows back and forth in front of the kids also shows them you don’t respect each other. (Do this often and don’t be surprised if your preschooler talks to you in a similarly disrespectful way when you’re having a battle.)

Remember: Dad’s way works, too

Most of us have criticized our husbands for not feeding or dressing our kids exactly as we would do it. “But this can make dad feel more like a parenting aide than an equal partner,” says Rosemond. And if he doesn’t think you trust him to take care of your kids as well as you do, resentment can build.

However, says Rosemond, men should guard against the temptation to skirt the demands of parenting by fleeing to work, the garage, or the couch in front of the TV.

Be a cheap date

You already know that a date with your husband can reignite that spark in your relationship — but keep in mind that it doesn’t have to be dinner and a movie. If you both work, meeting for lunch while the kids are in daycare can be just as fun as dinner at the same restaurant.

Colleen Langenfeld of Monument, Colorado, and her husband actually prefer a “date night” at home, rather than out. They rent a movie, put their two boys to bed, and pop a few frozen dinners in the microwave so nobody has to cook.

Understand the stages of marriage

If you can appreciate that the challenging times in your marriage are temporary, you’re less likely to feel trapped. Feeling disconnected from your partner while your kids are little is going to happen — and it doesn’t mean that your marriage is on the rocks.

“Instead, see your anger or frustration as a signal that you just need to back up and make a greater effort to connect with each other,” says Lindquist.

No matter how hard it may be at times, investing in your marriage now, while your children are young, is vitally important. “One of a child’s greatest anxieties is the fear that her parents won’t stay together,” says Rosemond. “So what is a child’s greatest comfort? Knowing that her parents’ relationship is as strong as it can be.”

In other words, you don’t have to choose between a happy marriage and happy, secure kids. By having the first, you’ll likely get the second as well.

Lets Be Thankful…

 

I must admit that one of the most important thing to do, more than “sometimes”, in life is to be thankful. We all have dreams, desires, goals, and needs, but never be ashamed to proclaim being thankful. How can you receive your blessing, your dreams, your needs, and desires when you are not conscience and thankful for what has been given to you thus far. I never forget the things I want out of life, but they seem to come quicker and easier when I do my part, let the Lord do his, and be thankful overall. I have continuously been in the habit of writing down my goals and prayers, and I let them lay with God and not in my worrying mind. I check back every few months and always smile because I start to check them off…all because I asked, prayed, and practiced Thanksgiving. For all those who have dreams, please do not dwell on what you want to achieve and receive “from” and “out of” life, but embrace giving thanks and being thankful. Lord knows there have been times when I had no money, no way, no light of inspiration but by being thankful, I maintained my praise for the Lord and he saw me heart and answered me. This is not to be preachy or some holly rolly person, even though I wouldn’t mind the name calling , I’m just stating what is honest and true and most importantly filled with good intentions based on my living personal testimonies.

I’m sorry, but this is Hilarious!!